I find it interesting that when I thought about what to call this particular page, this name just popped into my head. I have to say that it is so true, for me at least, the order of this phrase. This year has been full of learning. Learning through trial seems to be the theme this year! I tend to analyze perhaps to much while going through a particular trial/hard time. I want to know not so much why, but what do I need to learn from it, how can I be better, or what is the Lord trying to teach me? It leads to much reading and praying. Like I said I probably over do it but boy do I learn a lot about myself and how the Lord works with me.
Then I realized that the more I learned the more I loved, what ever it was that I needed to Love more, I did. At times, I know this may sound nuts, but I loved the trial. I was loving that I felt the spirit more, I was loving that I appreciated my family more, I loved myself more. Love is truly the underlying answer. Love is also serving, Charity IS the pure love of Christ. So learning to serve no matter in trial or not is HUGE. I tend to get so wrapped up in my wo that I shut out the world. I cant think about others, i have to focus on me, right? So wrong. When I did crawl out of my hole and thought about others or gave service, I felt lighter and for that brief moment I forgot about my hardship. President Monson's talk this last conference was so perfect for me. I really have to work on this one.
Then there is Live it. After trying to learn all I did, and trying to love more fully, I soon found it hard to actually LIVE it. I mean, you know how you can go through a trial and then feel the relief, or feel free from it? Do we continue to learn and love like we did? How easy is it to enjoy the free feeling that we just start coasting through life again? I realized that the true test is, do I LIVE what I LEARNED?
I stopped looking at life as just getting through the trials the best I can. One to the next. Taking a deep breath when all is well and then holding it when life feels like, well you know. I look at it like no matter what may come my way, if I continue to learn all I can about the Savior and His teachings, if I continue to increase my love in all things, then I am living life. What comes my way, either bad or good, it is just another opportunity to grow. I don't mean to make it sound simple or la de da. I know that many suffer more than I ever have. But I do feel that the Lord has stretched me more this year than ever before. I have felt more pain than ever before and i have felt more alone than ever before. I know it's not easy, I will never claim it to be. I can say however, that I am just beginning to fell some gratitude for what I have been allowed to go through and hope that I can just live life the way I know I should.
I want to say again that I know there are those who suffer more than I think I could ever bare. I know the Lord only allows us to experience what he KNOWS we can overcome. And even though my trails might seem lighter than others, I have been stretched and molded just a little more.
May this year of learning, Loving, and Living continue!
~Amie
